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2. Christian Fathers (6:4) 2. 基督徒父親(6:4)
If left
to themselves, children will be rebels, so it is necessary for the parents to
train their children. Years ago, the then Duke of
He must not provoke them. In Paul’s day, the father had supreme authority over the family. When a baby was born into a Roman family, for example, it was brought out and laid before the father. If he picked it up, it meant he was accepting it into the home. But if he did not pick it up, it meant the child was rejected. It could be sold, given away, or even killed by exposure. No doubt a father’s love would overcome such monstrous acts, but these practices were legal in that day. Paul told the parents, “Don’t use your authority to abuse the child, but to encourage and build the child.” To the Colossians he wrote, “Fathers, provoke not your children to anger, lest they be discouraged” (Col. 3:21). So, the opposite of “provoke” is “encourage.” 父親不要惹兒女的氣。在保羅的時代,父親對家庭擁有至高無上的權威。例如,當嬰兒出生在羅馬家庭時,它會被抱出來放在父親面前。如果他把嬰孩撿起來,這意味著他正在接受他進入家裡。但若父親不撿他起來,就意味著嬰孩被拒絕。他可以被出售,贈送,甚至被拋棄而死。毫無疑問,父親的愛會克服這種可怕的行為,但這些做法在當時是合法的。保羅告訴父母,“不要用你的權威來虐待孩子,而是要鼓勵和培養孩子。”他給歌羅西人寫的信,說道,“父親們,不要惹你的孩子的氣,免得他們灰心”(西 3:21)。所以,“激發” 的反義詞是“鼓勵”。
I was addressing a group of Christian students on the subject of prayer, and was pointing out that our Father in heaven is always available when we call. To illustrate it, I told them that the receptionist at our church office has a list of names prepared by me, and these people could get to me at any time, no matter what I was doing. Even if I was in a staff meeting or in a counseling session, if any of these people phoned, she was to call me immediately. At the top of this list was my family. Even if the matter seems to me inconsequential, I want my family to know that I am available. After the service, one of the students said to me, “Would you adopt me? I can never get through to my father, and I need his encouragement so much!” 我正在對一群基督徒學生就禱告的主題發表講話,並指出在天上的父上帝隨時在聽我們的禱告。為証實這點,我他們說,在教會辦公室我預備接待員的名單,這些人可以隨時找到我,不管我在做什麼。即使我正在參加員工會議或諮詢會議,如果這些人中的任何一人打來電話,她都會立即給我打電話。在這份名單的頂部是我的家人。即使這件事在我看來無關緊要,也希望我的家人知道我有空。講話結束後,其中一位學生說:“你願意收養我嗎? 我永遠無法與父親取得聯繫,我非常需要他的鼓勵!”
Fathers provoke their children and discourage them by saying one thing and doing another—by always blaming and never praising, by being inconsistent and unfair in discipline, and by showing favoritism in the home, by making promises and not keeping them, and by making light of problems that, to the children, are very important. Christian parents need the fullness of the Spirit so they can be sensitive to the needs and problems of their children. 父親通過說一套做另一套來激怒和勸阻他們 --- 總是責備而不是表揚,在管教上前後矛盾和不公平,在家裡表現出偏袒,做出承諾而不遵守承諾,以及輕視孩子們對他說的非常重要的問題。 基督徒父母需要聖靈的充滿,這樣他們才能對孩子的需要和問題有敏感。
He must
nurture them. The text reads, “But nurture them in the discipline and
admonition of the Lord.” The verb translated “bring them up” is the same word
that is translated “nourisheth” in Ephesians 5:29. The Christian husband is to
nourish his wife and his children by sharing love and encouragement in the
Lord. It is not enough to nurture the children physically by providing food, shelter,
and clothing. He must also nurture them emotionally and spiritually. The
development of the Boy Jesus is our example: “And Jesus increased in wisdom and
stature, and in favor with God and man” (Luke
He must
discipline them. The word “nurture” carries with it the idea of learning
through discipline. It is translated “chastening” in Hebrews 12. Some modern
psychologists oppose the old-fashioned idea of discipline, and many educators
follow their philosophy. “Let the children express themselves!” they tell us.
“If you discipline them, you may warp their characters.” Yet discipline is a
basic principle of life and an evidence of love. “Whom the Lord loveth He chasteneth” (Heb. 12:6). “He that spareth him chasteneth him
diligently” (Prov.
We must be sure, however, that we discipline our children in the right manner. To begin with, we must discipline in love and not in anger, lest we injure either the body or the spirit of the child, or possibly both. If we are not disciplined, we surely cannot discipline others, and “flying off the handle” never made either a better child or a better parent. 然而,必須確保我們以正確的方式管教孩子。首先,我們必須以愛,而不是憤怒來管教,以免傷害孩子的身體或靈性,或可能兩者兼而傷及。若我們不管教,肯定無法管教他人,而“失控”永遠不會使他們成為更好的孩子或更好的父母。
Also, our discipline must be fair and consistent. “My father would use a cannon to kill a mosquito!” a teenager once told me. “I either get away with murder, or get blamed for everything!” Consistent, loving discipline gives assurance to the child. He may not agree with us, but at least he knows that we care enough to build some protective walls around him until he can take care of himself. 另外,我們的管教必須公平和一致。“我父親可能會用大砲殺死蚊子!”一個少年曾經告訴我。 “我要么逍遙法外,要么為一切受到指責!”前後一致,充滿愛心的管教會給孩子帶來公正的保證。他可能不同意我們的作法,但至少他知道我們非常關心在他周圍築起保護的牆,直到他能照顧好自己為止。
“I never knew how far I could go,” a wayward girl told me, “because my parents never cared enough to discipline me. I figured that if it wasn’t important to them, why should it be important to me?” 一位任性的女孩告訴我,“從來不知道我能任性的到何程度,因為我的父母從來不關心管教我。我猜想我如果他們不重要,那為什麼這事對我會很重要?”
He must
instruct and encourage them. This is the meaning of the word admonition. The
father and mother not only use actions to raise the child, but also words. In
the book of Proverbs, for example, we have an inspired record of a father
sharing wise counsel with his son. Our children do not always appreciate our
counsel, but that does not eliminate the obligation we have to instruct and
encourage them. Of course, our instruction must always be tied to the Word of
God (see 2 Tim.
When the Supreme Court handed down its ruling against required prayer in the public schools, the famous editorial cartoonist Herblock published a cartoon in the Washington Post showing an angry father waving a newspaper at his family and shouting, “What do they expect us to do—listen to the kids pray at home?” The answer is yes! Home is the place where the children ought to learn about the Lord and the Christian life. It is time that Christian parents stop passing the buck to Sunday school teachers and Christian day-school teachers, and start nurturing their children. 當對公立學校的禱告要求最高法院作出裁決時,著名的社論漫畫家赫布洛(Herblock)在《華盛頓郵報》上發表了一幅漫畫,畫中一位憤怒的父親向家人揮舞著報紙大喊,“他們希望我們做什麼,是聽孩子在家裡祈禱嗎?”答案是肯定的! 孩子們應該在家裡了解主和基督徒生活的地方。現在是時候了,基督徒父母應停止把責任推給主日學老師,和基督教走讀學校老師們,來替父母管教他們的孩子。
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